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Michael accused of child abuse.

In August of 1993, police in Los Angeles began investigating allegations of child abuse made against Jackson. A civil case was filed at the time. In early 1994, the case settled out of court. The accuser, Jordie Chandler, was paid a reported settlement of $20 million.

In 1996 the accusers father Evan started a claim of $60 million stating that Jackson breached the previous agreement by discussing the case. This lawsuit was later thrown out of court.

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Who really is Michael Jackson?

Michael Jackson was once the biggest pop star on the planet, selling a record $50 million plus copies of his album "Thriller" in 1983. On the other hand, his last album "Invincible" only sold $5 million copies.

Speculation is that Michael Jackson actually died in 1983, shortly after the release and much success of the "Thriller" album. He was at that time replaced with an imposter. Why would anyone go to such great lengths to hide Jackson's death? Well, if for no other reason, than to protect his massive money-making potential, even if it met continuing beyond the grave.

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Michael's corpse found at Neverland Ranch.

During a search for evidence at the Neverland Ranch, Santa Barbara police annouced investigators had found Michael Jackson's corpse. Though the body showed advanced stages of decay, when compared to dental records and photos of Jackson prior to 1987, it was confirmed that the body was in fact that of Michael Jackson. The discovery sheds some light on the drastic changes in Jackson's behaviour and physical look since 1987. Investigators state "We don't know what kind of animal we're dealing with." in statements to reporters, "This man killed and took over someone else's life". When asked about the ongoing child abuse case, police commented, "What kind of sick individual prays on 13 year old cancer patients.".

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Michael cleared of abuse charges.

Jackson found not guilty of all charges in the child abuse case. The jury expected more compelling evidence in the case, but one jury member stated "it just wasn't there". Members of Jackson's family are relieved.

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"Michael Jackson is dead rumors" apply to his career only.

Financial partners of Michael Jackson in New York, got more than just a little worried when they started hearing rumors that the "king of pop" had died overnight in Bahrain. A Sony Music financial officer decided to call up Jackson's valet to ask if the rumor was true. The valet went into Jackson's room, in Bahrain, in the middle of the night and commenced to wake him up to make sure he was still alive. Jackson awoke confused, chuckled at the rumor and quickly dismissed his employee so he could get back to his Zzzzzzzzz!

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Child custody fight ends

Debbie Rowe, Jackson's ex-wife of 3 years, agreed to give up her parental rights to the couples two kids in 2001. In 2004, Debbie decided she would try to have that decision reversed, when the 10 child abuse charges surfaced against Jackson. At the end of the day though, a new settlement was agreed upon that addressed all the disoutes between Jackson and Rowe.

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James Brown dies after hearing about Jackson's big come back plan.

Reportedly, when the news of a Michael Jackson comeback was announced, James Brown had to be rushed to hospital where he died early the next morning.

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Family of dead woman sues Jackson.

Two years ago, a 73 yr old woman died in hospital who reportly had been moved from her two-bed trauma unit to make room for Jackson, who had been exhibiting some flu-like symptoms. The woman apparently suffered a second, this time fatal, heart attack after she had been moved. The family alleges intential infliction of emotional distress as well as a host of other claims.

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Michael's conversion to Islam.

An arab-Israeli newspaper announced that Jackson has converted to Islam, and plans to move to Nahrain, where he has bought property.

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Michael Jackson Is Dead.

A family spokesman announced this morning that Michael Jackson is dead. The 48 year old construction worker fell 30 ft to his death yesterday, while working on a renovation project in his home town of Muncie, Indiana.
* We would like to make it very clear that the deceased Michael Jackson mentioned above, is not the proposed "King of Pop" who used to live at the Neverland Ranch and allegedly bugger little boys.

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Michael Jackson's Company Bringing Beatles To iTunes

Michael Jackon's company denies rumors that they will be be making the Beatles musical catalog available on iTunes. Sony/ATV Music Publishing, owned by Sony and singer Michael Jackson, threw "cold water" on recent newspaper stories out of London making such claims.

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Neverland Ranch on Public Auction

Michael Jackson was forced to put his Neverland Ranch on public auction this month in light of the fact that he still owes $24 million on the property.

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Neverland Ranch saved from Public Auction

Michael Jackson refinanced the Neverland Ranch property just in time to save it from public auction.

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Disclaimer:

This site, though containing some factual information, is meant as a satrical look, in many respects, at the life and times of Michael Jackson. We apologise in advance if we have offended you in any way. Many of you may not share in our humour. Then again we really don't care. Have a nice day : )